Life

Great day or lousy day?

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It was one of those days when I was able to notice most of the good things in life – big and small.

Waking up to a new day – alive and healthy! Running water, hot and cold! Nice clothes to wear! Fresh juice to drink! A job to go to! Beautiful weather – neither hot nor cold! Train station close to home! Train that’s always on time! My favorite corner seat! An hour of thinking and reading time! Nice office – with a sea view! The old cleaning lady who cleans with a passion and greets with enthusiasm! Clean pantry with filtered drinking water! Lots of work to do – mostly enjoyable! A Mac that’s always reliable – no virus, no spam, no hanging up! High-speed Internet access! An email from Hamza recommending another productivity software! Lots of people who trust me with their problems and impossible deadlines! An unexpected lunch meeting in a nice and quiet restaurant with the most divine tempura! New things to learn! Central air-conditioning to keep us cold, and a portable heater under the desks when it gets too cold! Lots of things to laugh about! Coming home to a loving family! Still being in love with the same person after almost 30 years! Kids (many) that we are proud of! Amazing home-cooked food for dinner…WOW!

What kind of a day do you think I had? Amazing, exciting, wonderful, of course! There were some problems for sure and a few challenging situations, but somehow they all looked small and insignificant! On any given day we all have more good things than bad things. But when we fail to notice and acknowledge them, even small problems and challenges look big and we end up having a lousy day! If our days make up our life, we can pretty much control the quality of our lives, can’t we?

Make Today Count by John Maxwell

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maketodaycountI was just looking; I wasn’t going to buy anything. Until I saw this little book with a bold red and white cover and an interesting title. In fact, I liked the subtitle even better. I read it on the flight back from Singapore last month, and started re-reading it this week. Here’s a piece from the Introduction:

You will never change your life until you change something you do daily. You see, success doesn’t just suddenly occur one day in someone’s life. For that matter, neither does failure. Each is a process. Every day of your life is merely a preparation for the next. What you become is the result of what you do today. In other words… you are preparing for something. The way you live your life today is preparing you for tomorrow. The questions is, What are you preparing for? As my father used to tell me when I was growing up, “You can pay now and play later, or you can play now and pay later. But either way, you are going to pay.”

The book has twelve chapters – a dozen to focus on daily: Attitude, Priorities, Health, Family, Thinking, Commitment, Finances, Faith, Relationships, Generosity, Values and Growth. I’ll be happy to give my copy to the first person who asks.

Favorite Quotes – Dreams

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It is precisely the possibility of realizing a dream that makes life interesting. (Paulo Coelho)

When you really want something, the whole universe conspires to help you realize your dream. (Paulo Coelho)

Some men see things as they are and say, “Why?” I dream of things that never were and say, “Why not?” (George Bernard Shaw)

Dream no small dreams for they have no power to move the hearts of men. (Goethe)

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. (Mark Twain)

The most pitiful among men is he who turns his dreams into silver and gold. (Khalil Gibran)

Time Management: do less, get more done!

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We are all so busy. We have so many things to do, and so little time. We can’t get everything done. And even if we do, we don’t always get the sense of fulfillment. Most time management books try to teach you how to do more in less time. I think the secret to fulfillment is doing less, not more, but doing it with passion and attention and focus. To do less, I use the “4 D’s Principle”:

  1. First D is for ‘Drop it’. Some things don’t need to be done at all. E.g. what would happen if you don’t take that call while having dinner with your family? What if you don’t go to pick up that friend from the airport? What if you stopped washing the tub before and after every shower? What difference would it make?
  2. Second D is for ‘Delay it’. You notice your car is dirty. Do you have to wash it right now, or you can do it tomorrow? That email doesn’t have to be answered right now; you can do it after completing the proposal you are working on. You don’t have to open all the mail as soon as it arrives. Are there things you do every day that can be done once a week? Or things you do every week that can be done once a month?
  3. Third D is for ‘Delegate it’. So here’s something that can’t be dropped or delayed e.g. Your child needs to be taken to a doctor. The air conditioning needs to be fixed. The customer needs a product replacement or a refund. Ask yourself if you have to do it yourself, or whether you can get someone else to do it for you. You’ll be surprised how many people are willing to do things for you, only if you ask (nicely).
  4. Fourth D is obviously ‘Do it’. Your daily exercise. Time with your kids – reading, talking, playing, helping them with their school work, or just listening to them. Being with your loved one – the dinner, movie, walk or just being together. That course you have been wanting to do. That customer you need to call. That paper you need to write. The books you want to read. The friend you want to call. The vacation that you need. These are some of the things you won’t have to drop, delay or delegate if you follow the 4 D’s.

Look at all the stuff you do and see what can be dropped, delayed or delegated. How much more time you’ll have to do the things that really matter – that are important, as well as urgent! Please share your own examples.

Problems vs. Situations

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The idea that I am about to share seems too simple, but it has changed hundreds of lives, including mine: There are things you can change (problems) and there are things you can’t change (situations).

Most people seem to go through life fighting with, and agonizing over, things they can’t change e.g. weather, traffic, economy, their appearance, sickness, death, accidents. The result is frustration, depression, anger, anxiety, lot of stress and general unhappiness in life!

On the other hand, focusing on things we can change, improves the quality of our lives. We can change our attitudes, health, fitness, quality of our relationships, spending habits, level of our knowledge and skills, and many other things in life. Life is too short to try and change others.

A favorite prayer of mine: God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference!

Just what you need!

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There are two ways of going through life: Gather everything in sight, just in case you need it. Or trust that you’ll find exactly what you need, just in time. Guess which one lets you enjoy life more, lets you really stop and smell the roses?

Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom

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tuesdaysA true story of a dying professor who shares his wisdom with the author. Very inspiring and thought-provoking stuff on life, death, family, money, emotions, love and more. Here’s an excerpt from the Tuesday they talk about money:

“We’ve got a form of brainwashing going on in our country. Do you know how they brainwash people? They repeat something over and over. Owning things is good. More money is good. More property is good. More is good. More is good. We repeat it – and have it repeated to us – over and over until nobody bothers to even think otherwise. The average person is so fogged up by all this, he has no perspective on what’s really important anymore.

“Wherever I went in my life, I met people wanting to gobble up something new. Gobble up a new car. Gobble up a new piece of property. Gobble up the latest toy. And they wanted to tell you about it. ‘Guess what I got? Guess what I got?’ These were people so hungry for love that they were accepting substitutes. But it never works. You can’t substitute material things for love or for gentleness or for tenderness. I can tell you, as I am sitting here dying, when you most need it, neither money nor power will give you the feeling you’re looking for, no matter how much of them you have.”

J.K. Rowling talks about the Benefits of Failure

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JK Rowling, the author of Harry Potter, gave an inspiring speech at the Harvard University Commencement Address. She talked about the fringe benefits of failure and the importance of imagination. Here’s a part of it:

“You might never fail on the scale I did, but some failure in life is inevitable. It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all – in which case, you fail by default.

“Failure gave me an inner security that I had never attained by passing examinations. Failure taught me things about myself that I could have learned no other way. I discovered that I had a strong will, and more discipline than I had suspected; I also found out that I had friends whose value was truly above rubies.

“The knowledge that you have emerged wiser and stronger from setbacks means that you are, ever after, secure in your ability to survive. You will never truly know yourself, or the strength of your relationships, until both have been tested by adversity. Such knowledge is a true gift, for all that it is painfully won, and it has been worth more to me than any qualification I ever earned.

“Given a time machine or a Time Turner, I would tell my 21-year-old self that personal happiness lies in knowing that life is not a check-list of acquisition or achievement. Your qualifications, your CV, are not your life, though you will meet many people of my age and older who confuse the two. Life is difficult, and complicated, and beyond anyone’s total control, and the humility to know that will enable you to survive its vicissitudes.”

Read the full speech here.

The Secret by Rhonda Byrne

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secret.jpgA great motivational book about the power of our thoughts and how to apply it in our lives. A superb team of authors, teachers and speakers bring you The Secret to health, wealth, relationships and happiness.

What a Wonderful World

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If you are feeling gloomy and the worlds seems dreary, let Rod Stewart remind us of the beauty of the world and the blessings in our lives:

Want to tell us about the good things in your life? Go ahead, spread some cheer!