The three symptoms of killing our dreams

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A repost from Paulo Coehlo’s blog, it’s a piece from one of my favorite books, The Pilgrimage.

The first symptom of the process of killing our dreams is the lack of time. The busiest people I have known in my life always have time enough to do everything. Those who do nothing are always tired and pay no attention to the little amount of work they are required to do. They complain constantly that the day is too short. The truth is, they are afraid to fight the Good Fight.

The second symptom of the death of our dreams lies in our certainties. Because we don’t want to see life as a grand adventure, we begin to think of ourselves as wise and fair and correct in asking so little of life. We look beyond the walls of our day-to-day existence, and we hear the sound of lances breaking, we smell the dust and the sweat, and we see the great defeats and the fire in the eyes of the warriors. But we never see the delight, the immense delight in the hearts of those who are engaged in the battle. For them, neither victory nor defeat is important; what’s important is only that they are fighting the Good Fight.

And, finally, the third symptom of the passing of our dreams is peace. Life becomes a Sunday afternoon; we ask for nothing grand, and we cease to demand anything more than we are willing to give. In that state, we think of ourselves as being mature; we put aside the fantasies of our youth, and we seek personal and professional achievement. We are surprised when people our age say that they still want this or that out of life. But really, deep in our hearts, we know that what has happened is that we have renounced the battle for our dreams – we have refused to fight the Good Fight.

When we renounce our dreams and find peace, we go through a short period of tranquility. But the dead dreams begin to rot within us and to infect our entire being.
We become cruel to those around us, and then we begin to direct this cruelty against ourselves. That’s when illnesses and psychoses arise. What we sought to avoid in combat – disappointment and defeat – come upon us because of our cowardice.

And one day, the dead, spoiled dreams make it difficult to breathe, and we actually seek death. It’s death that frees us from our certainties, from our work, and from that terrible peace of our Sunday afternoon.

[Photo from this year’s best collection, taken at Sai Kung, Hong Kong]

3 more tips to avoid clutter

 

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I continue to believe that a minimalistic and uncluttered life can lead to more productivity, increased efficiency and greater happiness. I’ve written several blog posts on my experiments with minimalism and tips to reduce clutter – at work, at home and life in general. Here’s a short version, because I think it all starts with buying stuff…

Buy mindfully:

  • Only buy what you need – really need. If it’s a temporary need, see if can be borrowed or rented.
  • Go with a shopping list and stay focused. Don’t be distracted by displays or special offers.
  • Don’t buy anything ‘just in case’ you might need it. Trust that you’ll find it ‘just in time’.
  • Always buy quality. It lasts longer, so costs less in the long run.
  • Don’t compromise on your style, size or color, otherwise you may be discarding it too soon.

Discard ruthlessly:

  • Once you buy a new something, get rid of the old one. Not tomorrow, not later, right now.
  • Find local charities or Salvation Army stores where the old stuff could go. If it’s too bad or old or broken to go to charity, then recycle it.
  • Give yourself limited space to keep your stuff. Once that space fills up, you know it’s time to reduce.

Use gratefully:

  • Whether it’s clothing, gadgets, books or other possessions, be grateful every time you use them. Remind yourself that millions of people do no have access to such luxury.
  • One of the biggest reasons for buying and accumulating stuff is being ungrateful for what we already have – that feeling of not having enough.
  • When we are grateful, we take good care of our stuff, and don’t discard/replace them easily.

If that sounds too difficult, just take one step at a step. And perhaps developing the attitude of gratitude would be a good start.

6 Key Ideas on Simplifying Your Life (and fit all your belongings in an 18kg bag or less)!

mush-panjwanis-possessions-in-an-18kg-bag.jpgDuring a recent move, I was proud to put together all of my personal stuff (everything that I own) into an 18kg bag. And the FB post got a lot of interest – some wouldn’t believe, some wanted to know what’s in it, some curious to learn how or why. And that inspired this blog post, and I am happy to share why I do it and how.

It’s a lifestyle! Accumulating less stuff; getting rid of unwanted things; keeping within a pre-defined space; staying organized… is not a one-time project. It’s a lifestyle. I started the process about ten years ago, and wrote the first blog post on the subject five years ago. That post covers how I got rid of all the books, reduced the amount of clothes, minimized all accessories, simplified and organized everything, and then applied the same principals to my office and desk.

Why de-clutter and simplify?

  • Easy to find what you are looking for, whether it’s a file on your computer or a travel adaptor
  • Take less space, whether it’s a wardrobe, cabinet or a shoe rack
  • Focus on quality instead of quantity
  • Spend more on experiences (books, travel, personal development, causes) and less on things (except those you buy for others)

Buy less, of everything

  • Buy only what you need, and only when you need it, not whatever is on sale.
  • Wait and see if you really need it. Then see if you can borrow it, before you buy.
  • Buy good quality so it lasts longer and you buy less often.
  • Buy only if there’s space to keep it, not find a space after you buy it.

Continue getting rid of stuff

  • When you buy a new one, get rid of the old one – clothes, shoes, bags, stuff
  • If you bought something but not using it, either due lack of interest or wrong purchase, get rid of it.
  • If you get a gift that you know you are not going to use, get rid of it.
  • If you haven’t used it in 6 months, get rid of it.
  • Only keep stuff that’s essential, makes life easier, or inspires you. Get rid of everything else.
  • When getting rid of anything, try to sell or give away to somebody who can make use of it or recycle. Trash bin should be the last option.

Use technology

  • Unless you can’t live without the touch and smell of physical books, go digital. There’s a long list of pros and cons, but I only buy ebooks and only read on my iPad.
  • Covert all important documents, photo and videos into digital copies and put them all on Dropbox or iCloud. In my recent round, I took photos of loads of ‘emotional-value objects’ and threw them all out. These included large photo frames, desk gifts, crystals, accessories and more… all with thank-you notes, names, or messages printed/engraved on them. These were in a large box, which I don’t have any more!
  • I’ve stopped using notebooks or diaries and pens for a long time. All notes are digital.

Learn to live with less

  • So what do I have in that suitcase? Clothes: formal, casual, summer, winter, gym and swimming gear. Shoes: just two pairs. Gadgets: MacBook, iPad, cables. Lots of socks and underwear; last few copies of my book to give away; pack of business cards; travel toiletries in mini sizes; travel adaptors. No ties, accessories, notebooks, stationery or camera.
  • Living with less inspires gratefulness; helps you keep organized; reduces stress; gets you more focused… is extremely easy to pack and move and unpack!

I know it’s easier said than done. I understand this may not be for everyone. I am sure there are people who can be happier with more, but for me, less stuff equals more happiness. I am happy to answer any questions and offer further advice to anyone who is starting on this journey or wants to get to the next level of minimalism.

 

 

Mush Talks #13: Julia Wong of ‘Triple Lanterns Cafe’ talks about dreams, happiness and slowing down

Triple Lanterns Café is one of the stilt houses in Tai O Village (Hong Kong), offering beautiful views of the canal, the bridge and sunset, besides great pizzas, cakes and coffees. What makes this café really special though is Julia, the owner, who is always happy and cheerful, and ready for a conversation with every customer. During our visit to Triple Lanterns yesterday, we talked about the story behind the café, dreams, happiness, success, customer service and the importance of slowing down to enjoy life… parts of which were also captured on my phone. Here’s an edited version, and I hope it inspires somebody to follow through on their dreams…

More about achieving your dreams, happiness and positivity at Mush Talks #1-12

10 Reasons You Should Travel Solo at Least Once a Year!

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The first time I wrote about ‘five reasons I travel solo‘ was in August 2012, after my trip to Chenzhou in China. Since then I’ve been blessed with many more solo trips and experienced the endless joys. Earlier this month, I was in Da Nang and Hoi An in Vietnam, for a week, all by myself. I got to experience for the first time…

  • Living on USD20 a day, including accommodation, meals and transport!
  • Riding a scooter, and that too on the right side of the road!
  • Learning to make ‘Vietnamese fish rolls’!
  • Homestay in the middle of rice fields (way different from the B&B above the rice terraces in China)!
  • Taking a tour with a traffic police officer!
  • Starting an online travel journal on TravelPod!

Most of these wouldn’t have been possible if I wasn’t traveling solo. So here’s my expanded list of benefits, and why you should travel solo at least once a year:

  1. Plan easily. Pick your own dates and destination. The places-to-see on your list are not the same as the places your family or friends want to see. And finding a time that suits everyone is not easy.
  2. Try new things – accommodations, means of travel, food – and get out of your comfort zone.
  3. Have conversations with fellow travelers and locals. You learn a lot more about the people and places when you are on your own.
  4. Be more flexible with your time, destinations and decisions you make. Wake up for sunrise or sleep all day.
  5. Overcome your fears. Whether it’s fear of new places, fear of being on your own or fear of darkness… the more you travel the less you fear.
  6. Gain confidence by handling problems and situations on your own. You take your own risks and learn.
  7. Indulge in whatever you want, without being judged.
  8. Stay within your own budget. No compromises or overspending.
  9. Become a better traveler by observing more. You engage more fully with the people and places when you are on your own.
  10. Get to know yourself better. When you are on your own, it’s easier to listen to your heart and focus your mind. The extended me time is an opportunity to dream, plan, think, and even reflect on your travel experiences.

That doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy traveling with family, friends or groups… solo travel just a different kind of great experience!

PS. One of the most common questions I got asked by fellow travellers and locals: ‘Your wife doesn’t mind your solo travels?‘ And the answer is, one of the reasons we have been so happy with each other for over 30 years is that we accept, understand and appreciate the differences between us. And we allow each other to do our own things. [Thank you, Salma!]

You may view all the photos from the Vietnam trip and the daily journal on TravelPod here, or a selection of photos on Facebook through this link. And more of my travel videos here.

Moments of 2015 by Mush Panjwani

And 10 inspiring quotes about moments:

  • “Life isn’t perfect, but it has perfect moments.”
  • “Sometimes you will never know the value of a moment, until it becomes a memory.”
  • “The best things in life are not things, they are moments.”
  • “A good life is a collection of happy moments.”
  • “Don’t wait for the perfect moment; take the moment and make it perfect.”
  • “We don’t remember days; we remember moments.”
  • “Fall in love with moments.”
  • “You don’t get the same moment twice in life.”
  • “Life is all about moments of impact, and how they change our lives forever.”
  • “Make this moment count.”

What is Success?

For many years, I have struggled to come up with a perfect answer to this question. The following piece from Paulo Coelho’s “Manuscripts Found in Accra” is the best answer I’ve ever read. I hope it inspires you too:

Manuscript found in Accra

Success does not come from having one’s work recognised by others. It is the fruit of the seed that you lovingly planted. When harvest time arrives, you can say to yourself: ‘I succeeded.’

You succeeded in gaining respect for your work because you did not work only to survive, but to demonstrate your love for others.

You managed to finish what you began, even though you did not foresee all the traps along the way. And when your enthusiasm waned because of the difficulties you encountered, you reached for discipline. And when discipline seemed about to disappear because you were tired, you used your moments of repose to think about what steps you needed to take in the future.

You were not paralyzed by the defeats that are inevitable in the lives of those who take risks. You didn’t sit agonising over what you lost when you had an idea that didn’t work.

You didn’t stop when you experienced moments of glory, because you had not yet reached your goal. And when you had to ask for help, you did not feel humiliated. And when you learned that someone needed help, you showed them all that you had learned, without fearing that you might be revealing secrets or being used by others. 

 

Maysoon Zayid: One of the most dinchack (wow!) TED talks ever!

Wow! Maysoon is extremely inspiring, super funny and very beautiful. One of the most dinchack (wow!) TED talks I’ve ever heard…

You may watch in HD on TED through this link.

Inspiration from Hal Lasko: 98-year old Pixel Painter

Also check out the other blog for news and updates on Dinchack. And the Dinchack Facebook page for daily tips on happiness, motivation and success.

Inspiration from Dookaz

IMG_2506I bumped into Dookaz website when looking for good quality t-shirt suppliers for Dinchack. That’s how I met the owner, Iris Chan, whose story is nothing short of inspirational, and something I must share…

Iris is a qualified nurse who always wanted do something bigger and better, something that helps the community. So she founded Dookaz a few years ago, with a promise to:

  • make changes to our environment by doing what is right
  • encourage and conduct fair trade, fair business, equality and justice
  • encourage and protect our environment
  • spread positive messages all round

IMG_2502That’s quite an undertaking for a t-shirt company. After the initial challenges of any new business, her work became known in Hong Kong. They were the first company to offer anyone to print their own design, logo or message on t-shirts, without any minimum quantities – as long as the message was positive. Iris started teaching under-priveleged children and adults to learn how to make t-shirts and make a living. Business expanded to printing bags and shoes and labelling services, but still ensuring that none of the material or process would cause any harm to the human body or the environment. Her team grew to over 20 designers and workers, all of them as passionate as her to do good.

Then few months ago, her machinery broke down. With no money for repairs, business depended on handmade stuff only, and soon started to decline. She lost the entire team one after the other, but continued working all by herself to serve her existing clients as best as she could. Then last week, she broke her arm. All her family and friends told her this is a sign that she should finally close down the business. But Iris said, ‘I still have one arm, and the other will be ok soon’. And there she is, making t-shirts all by herself, with just one arm, serving her clients with a smile, and making a difference!

Iris is likely to read this piece, so please feel free to share your comments with her.

10 of the shortest and the most inspiring Buddha quotes

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Today is a celebration of Buddha’s birthday in Hong Kong. And here’s a collection of the shortest but very inspiring quotes by Buddha. Each one seems so simple, yet is so deep.

  1. You have no cause for anything but gratitude and joy.
  2. What you are is what you have been. What you’ll be is what you do now.
  3. Hatred does not cease by hatred, but only by love; this is the eternal rule.
  4. Until he has unconditional and unbiased love for all beings, man will not find peace.
  5. We are shaped by our thoughts; we become what we think.
  6. Every human being is the author of his own health or disease.
  7. Always be mindful of the kindness and not the faults of others.
  8. It is a man’s own mind, not his enemy or foe, that lures him to evil ways.
  9. Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without.
  10. Live every act fully, as if it were your last.

Do you have a favorite Buddha quote, or any other short inspiring quote to share?

[Photo of a wall hanging in a store – probably unauthorized]

For daily tips on happiness, motivation and success, join the Dinchack Facebook page.

Book Recommendation: Manuscript Found in Accra

IMG_2337I just finished reading this wonderful book by Paulo Coelho, and recommend to anyone looking for inspiration. Some excerpts:

“Losing a battle or losing everything we thought we possessed will bring us moments of sadness. But when those moments pass, we will discover the hidden strength that exists in each of us, a strength that will surprise us and increase our self-respect. We will look around and say to ourselves: ‘I survived.’ And we will be cheered by our words. Only those who fail to recognise that inner strength will say: ‘I lost’, and be sad.”

“Defeat ends when we launch into another battle. Failure has no end; it is a lifetime choice.”

“Stay close to those who sing, tell stories, and enjoy life, and whose eyes sparkle with happiness. Because happiness is contagious and will always manage to find a solution, whereas logic can find only an explanation for the mistake made.”

“Anxiety was born in the very same moment as mankind. And since we will never be able to master it, we will have to learn to live with it – just as we have learned to live with storms. For those who cannot learn to do so, life will be a nightmare.”

What’s your favorite Paulo Coelho’s book? Or any inspiration book. Please share through comments.

Dinchack Facebook page crossed 2500 fans! Check it out for daily tips on happiness, motivation and success.

Happy May Day: I start as an entrepreneur today!

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First, a confession: I am very scared, though I keep telling myself ‘failure is an option, but fear is not’.

When I lost my job, I had two choices. On one hand, there were bills and mortgage, and the need to quickly start earning a stable income. I had been used to the comforts and securities of a ‘job’ for 27 years, so looking for another job seemed like the obvious choice.

But on the other hand, there was a dream and an option to finally pursue it. An opportunity to use my training skills to make a difference in many more lives, outside of one company. And to increase my income to match my dreams.

I chose risk, insecurity and uncertainty. I launched my training company, Dinchack. And today is officially the first day of operation. I started working at 0600 this morning, and I am very tempted to take the rest of the day off 🙂

What a great day to start a new venture. 1st May symbolizes a change of season in most countries – either the start of spring or of summer, depending on where you are. For me, it’s the beginning of the much awaited new chapter in my life!

1st May is also known as Labor Day, May Day or International Workers’ Day that’s celebrated in more than 80 countries. What better way to celebrate workers’ day than to start working for yourself!

You may check out Dinchack website here. And join Dinchack Facebook page for daily tips on happiness, motivation and success. Please feel free to leave any comments, good wishes or questions about Dinchack.

Dhinchak Life, free preview ebook!

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I turned 48 today, and this e-book is a small gift from me! This is part of the first section of my book, Dhinchak Life. If you already have the book, this may serve as a reminder of the principals that can make you happier, and in full color. And if you haven’t got the book yet, this may inspire you to buy a copy.

The photos used in the book are from my travels during the last year. I hope they inspire you to go out and visit these beautiful places.

Thanks to Sara Mush, my brilliant daughter, for creating this e-book version. Just click on the image to download, or download from here, and don’t forget to share with friends. Wishing you many Dhinchak moments!

10 tips to stay happy and motivated after getting fired…

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“Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.” -Dr. Seuss

I wrote this within two days of getting fired from my job, but decided to hold it till I’ve completed a couple of weeks. That gave me an opportunity to ensure that I applied all the Do’s and avoided all the Don’ts myself . These tips have not only allowed me to stay happy and motivated, but also focused on the new possibilities and making the right choices for the next phase of my life:

  1. Don’t deny it. If you aren’t normally prepared for the realities and changes in life, your first thoughts could be ‘I can’t believe it’, ‘It can’t be happening to me’. It’s OK, as long as you don’t remain in the state of denial for days or weeks. Remind yourself that thousands of people lose their jobs daily; it’s beyond your control. The quicker you accept the reality, the faster you can move on with your life.
  2. Don’t make it personal. Most sudden layoffs are results of corporate decisions, often part of cost-cutting exercises. Don’t make it personal with your boss or the HR manager. The world is too small to make enemies, and life is too short to hold grudges. And what if it is personal? Your best option is still to forgive, forget and move on.
  3. Don’t beat yourself. Unless you were terminated due to poor performance or misconduct, there’s no point in beating yourself and self-pity. Remind yourself of your skills and strengths that made you successful in this job, and will make you successful in your next venture.
  4. Don’t get angry. Getting angry with your family, friends, cat, the taxi guy or anyone else is not going to change anything, except adding to the negative emotions. Remind yourself ‘when things seem to be falling apart, sometimes they are actually falling into place.’ So keep your cool.
  5. Don’t give up your health regimen. Losing a job is no excuse to binge on unhealthy stuff or give up the exercise. That will only make your feel worse, while increased physical activity will boost your motivation. Continue reading

An exciting first week – after losing my job!

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The only reason I posted the news last Friday, within hours of getting fired from my job, was because it was the fastest and most efficient way of letting everyone in my world know what had happened and that I was actually excited about the situation. I never expected to receive 200+ beautiful messages through comments on the blog, Facebook, emails, SMS, whatsapp and phone calls! I can’t express in words how thrilled, excited, blessed and grateful I felt reading those messages. I smiled, laughed and cried. It would be a huge understatement to say that ‘you made my day/week’. You made my life! Thank you.

To those who keep saying ‘is that true?’ ‘how did it happen?’ ‘but why?’ ‘i still can’t believe’ etc., I can only say, ‘get over it, move on’!

To those who think they have lost a leader, mentor, guru, hero (and all those amazing words I didn’t think I was worthy of), I am very much alive and will continue doing what I do best. Feel free to connect with me through this blog, Facebook, or Twitter. I will also continue to post my photos and videos on Flickr and YouTube.

So what am I up to?

  • I have freelance work from the company till the end of April, to complete the ongoing projects and fulfill my travel commitments to the distributors. That means I get to see some of you soon!
  • I am working on my first CV ever, while also developing certain business plans. Absolutely over the moon about the possibilities!
  • I am doing more reading, more writing and more thinking! I’m still following the diet, and have more time for exercise too.
  • We have leased a much cheaper apartment at one of the edges of Hong Kong, and shifting in a few weeks. It’s much farther from the city but a bit bigger and right on top of a beautiful beach!
  • The family is totally supportive and positive, and we have never been closer!

Thanks again for your wonderful support and encouragement!

You are not just ‘OK’, you are ‘incredibly blessed’!

DLOf all the things I have learnt about personal motivation, this is one of the most profound. I learnt this more than 20 years ago from the book Awaken the Giant Within by Anthony Robbins, and my life has never been the same:

  • English language has over 500,000 words, but our habitual vocabulary consists of 2,000 to 10,000 words. Less than 2%.
  • There are over 3,000 words to describe human emotions. About 1,000 for positive emotions and about 2,000 for negative emotions.
  • Most words, in addition to their literal meanings, convey distinct emotional intensity. This means our choice of words gives us the power to take the most negative feelings and lower their intensity to the point where they no longer bother us. And similarly, we can take a positive experience and move it to greater heights of pleasure.
  • What are some of the commonly used words to describe negative emotions? Now think of new words that help lower the intensity of the negative emotions e.g.
  • Replace ‘depressed’ with ‘not on top of it’
  • Disappointed with Under whelmed
  • Failing with Learning
  • Frustrated with Challenged
  • Pissed off with Peeved
  • I hate with I prefer
  • Insulted with Misunderstood
  • Painful with Uncomfortable
  • Illness/sickness with Cleansing
  • Stuck with Busy
  • Starved with Hungry
  • Similarly, what are some of the positive/mediocre words that you can replace with more powerful words to increase the intensity of the positive emotion e.g. Continue reading
  • Good luck, bad luck, who knows?

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    Once upon a time, in a far away land, there lived a farmer with his family. This farmer had a horse that one day, ran away to the hills. So the farmer and his son had to plow their fields themselves. Their neighbors watched them working hard and said “Oh, we pity you, what bad luck that your horse ran away!” But the farmer replied “Good luck, bad luck, who knows?”

    The next week, the horse returned to the farm, bringing a herd of wild horses with him. “What wonderful luck!” cried the neighbors. But the farmer responded “Good luck, bad luck, who knows?”

    Then, the farmer’s son tried to ride one of the wild horses. He was thrown off and broke his leg. “Ah, such bad luck!” sympathized the neighbors. Once again, the farmer responded “Good luck, bad luck, who knows?”

    A short time after, the emperor recruited all young men to join his army for battle. The son, with his broken leg, was left at home. “What good luck that your son was not forced into the army!” celebrated the neighbors. And the farmer remarked “Good luck, bad luck, who knows?”

    A re-post from Eva Snijders’ blog.

    So what’s happening in your life that seems good luck or bad luck?

    [Photo of Chinese red lanterns – symbol of good luck – from Guilin]