What do you think of the company name and logo? What do you think will be the business of D!nchack? Thank you for your fantastic support and encouragement!
Motivation
10 tips to stay happy and motivated after getting fired…
“Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.” -Dr. Seuss
I wrote this within two days of getting fired from my job, but decided to hold it till I’ve completed a couple of weeks. That gave me an opportunity to ensure that I applied all the Do’s and avoided all the Don’ts myself . These tips have not only allowed me to stay happy and motivated, but also focused on the new possibilities and making the right choices for the next phase of my life:
- Don’t deny it. If you aren’t normally prepared for the realities and changes in life, your first thoughts could be ‘I can’t believe it’, ‘It can’t be happening to me’. It’s OK, as long as you don’t remain in the state of denial for days or weeks. Remind yourself that thousands of people lose their jobs daily; it’s beyond your control. The quicker you accept the reality, the faster you can move on with your life.
- Don’t make it personal. Most sudden layoffs are results of corporate decisions, often part of cost-cutting exercises. Don’t make it personal with your boss or the HR manager. The world is too small to make enemies, and life is too short to hold grudges. And what if it is personal? Your best option is still to forgive, forget and move on.
- Don’t beat yourself. Unless you were terminated due to poor performance or misconduct, there’s no point in beating yourself and self-pity. Remind yourself of your skills and strengths that made you successful in this job, and will make you successful in your next venture.
- Don’t get angry. Getting angry with your family, friends, cat, the taxi guy or anyone else is not going to change anything, except adding to the negative emotions. Remind yourself ‘when things seem to be falling apart, sometimes they are actually falling into place.’ So keep your cool.
- Don’t give up your health regimen. Losing a job is no excuse to binge on unhealthy stuff or give up the exercise. That will only make your feel worse, while increased physical activity will boost your motivation. Continue reading
An exciting first week – after losing my job!
The only reason I posted the news last Friday, within hours of getting fired from my job, was because it was the fastest and most efficient way of letting everyone in my world know what had happened and that I was actually excited about the situation. I never expected to receive 200+ beautiful messages through comments on the blog, Facebook, emails, SMS, whatsapp and phone calls! I can’t express in words how thrilled, excited, blessed and grateful I felt reading those messages. I smiled, laughed and cried. It would be a huge understatement to say that ‘you made my day/week’. You made my life! Thank you.
To those who keep saying ‘is that true?’ ‘how did it happen?’ ‘but why?’ ‘i still can’t believe’ etc., I can only say, ‘get over it, move on’!
To those who think they have lost a leader, mentor, guru, hero (and all those amazing words I didn’t think I was worthy of), I am very much alive and will continue doing what I do best. Feel free to connect with me through this blog, Facebook, or Twitter. I will also continue to post my photos and videos on Flickr and YouTube.
So what am I up to?
- I have freelance work from the company till the end of April, to complete the ongoing projects and fulfill my travel commitments to the distributors. That means I get to see some of you soon!
- I am working on my first CV ever, while also developing certain business plans. Absolutely over the moon about the possibilities!
- I am doing more reading, more writing and more thinking! I’m still following the diet, and have more time for exercise too.
- We have leased a much cheaper apartment at one of the edges of Hong Kong, and shifting in a few weeks. It’s much farther from the city but a bit bigger and right on top of a beautiful beach!
- The family is totally supportive and positive, and we have never been closer!
Thanks again for your wonderful support and encouragement!
You are not just ‘OK’, you are ‘incredibly blessed’!
Of all the things I have learnt about personal motivation, this is one of the most profound. I learnt this more than 20 years ago from the book Awaken the Giant Within by Anthony Robbins, and my life has never been the same:
- English language has over 500,000 words, but our habitual vocabulary consists of 2,000 to 10,000 words. Less than 2%.
- There are over 3,000 words to describe human emotions. About 1,000 for positive emotions and about 2,000 for negative emotions.
- Most words, in addition to their literal meanings, convey distinct emotional intensity. This means our choice of words gives us the power to take the most negative feelings and lower their intensity to the point where they no longer bother us. And similarly, we can take a positive experience and move it to greater heights of pleasure.
- What are some of the commonly used words to describe negative emotions? Now think of new words that help lower the intensity of the negative emotions e.g.
- Replace ‘depressed’ with ‘not on top of it’
- Disappointed with Under whelmed
- Failing with Learning
- Frustrated with Challenged
- Pissed off with Peeved
- I hate with I prefer
- Insulted with Misunderstood
- Painful with Uncomfortable
- Illness/sickness with Cleansing
- Stuck with Busy
- Starved with Hungry
I lost my job today, but I am grateful and excited!
I lost my job today! Few immediate negative thoughts:
- How could they do that to me? I’ve been working here for over 16 years!
- What will I do now? There aren’t many opportunities in my specialized field and my set of skills!
- How long can I survive without a job? The mortgage, bills, kids… and the bigger dreams!
- Why did it happen at the worst possible time?
Fortunately, there were a lot more positive thoughts that followed:
- Most dynamic companies go through restructuring, reorganizing and cost-cutting. Nothing personal!
- Thousands of people lose their jobs every day around the world – there are over 197 million unemployed people. This is part of working life and can happen to anyone, any time.
- There are endless opportunities if I look with an open mind, and beyond my current industry!
- It’s an exciting challenge, and I am totally ready for it. I must stay focused, continue to believe and dream.
- The timing couldn’t be better! I’ll be 48 in a few weeks. It’s time to do something even more exciting!
And looking back, I felt even more grateful and excited that my job had allowed me to learn so many new things, develop different skills, almost master the art of training, travel the world, see amazing places, meet wonderful people… and above all, make a difference in the lives of so many people in so many places! My job is gone but all of that will stay with me forever! And all of that has prepared me for the next phase of my life.
“When we least expect it, life sets us a challenge to test our courage and willingness to change. At such moment, there is no point in pretending that nothing has happened or in saying that we are not yet ready. The challenge will not wait. Life does not look back…” -Paolo Coelho
Please feel free to share your words of support and encouragement through comments.
Update (17th March): Thank you for such kind, nice, wonderful, amazing, surprising messages! I am deeply touched by your love. And also under a lot of pressure to do something big 🙂 I have no issues with the company, and do not wish to hear anything negative.
4 ways to feel unhappy and miserable!
Feeling unhappy and miserable must be one of the easiest things to do, considering that almost every other person does that most of the time. Here’s how I think people get unhappy, sad and depressed:
- Think of all the things you do not have: more money, the perfect job, better relationships, great health, slim body, free time… that’s sure to make you unhappy and sad.
- Focus on all the imperfections in the people around you: she is not tidy enough; he is not obedient enough; they are not caring enough; people are inconsiderate; he never listens; she never understands… that will make you angry and frustrated.
- Imagine all the things that could go wrong: you could lose your job; the economy could get worse; someone you love could leave you; there could be another tsunami; the world could come to an end; you could get a major illness… that will make you worried and depressed.
- Blame everyone and everything possible for all the problems in your life, except yourself: your parents/upbringing, your country/government, your company/boss/colleagues, your friends, the economy/’market’, customers/buyers, the weather, gods… and see if you feel the helplessness and lack of control.
I know these always work; I have done that quite a few times in my life. Fortunately, I have also learnt the antidote to depression and unhappiness: Be grateful for what you do have; focus on all the good things; do not worry about things that haven’t happened; accept responsibility. I know it’s easier said than done, but it’s a fact that how we feel is totally in our control.
“Just as your car runs more smoothly, and requires less energy to go faster and farther, when the wheels are in perfect alignment, you perform better when your thoughts, feelings and emotions are in balance.” -Brian Tracy
[The two photos on top and bottom were taken within 15 minutes of each other – Aberdeen Harbor, Hong Kong]
Don’t wait!
Don’t wait…
- for an occasion to bring flowers, buy gifts, send a card or say ‘i love you’ to the one you love
- to say ‘thank you’ or ‘sorry’
- for the perfect moment; take the moment and make it perfect
- for the right time; time will never be right
- for people to be friendly, show them how
- until your life is almost over to realize how great it’s been
- for things to happen; make them happen
- for next year; a year from now you’ll wish you’d started today
- for the new year to make your resolutions
- until tomorrow; it may be a day too late!
What are you waiting for?
The lies we tell…
The lies we tell ourselves and others…
Lie: I am late because of traffic
Truth: I am late because I got up late; I am late because I am not organized…
Lie: I don’t have time to read/exercise/call…
Truth: I am not really interested or committed
Lie: I am not good enough for…
Truth: I haven’t learnt how to…
And some more…
There’s plenty of time/life for…
It’s just one bite…
People are no good…
I’ll be happy when…
What other lies can you add?
[Photo of sunrise in Hong Kong. Some more photos of the sun and moon between 31st Dec and 1st Jan here]
“Un-inspiring” quotes about the New Year!
- “Write it on your heart that every day is the best day in the year.” -Ralph Waldo Emerson
- “New Year’s Day: Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.” -Mark Twain
- “Time has no divisions to mark its passage, there is never a thunder-storm or blare of trumpets to announce the beginning of a new month or year. Even when a new century begins it is only we mortals who ring bells and fire off pistols.” -Thomas Mann
- “New Year’s is a harmless annual institution, of no particular use to anybody save as a scapegoat for promiscuous drunks, and friendly calls and humbug resolutions.” -Mark Twain
- “Year’s end is neither an end nor a beginning but a going on, with all the wisdom that experience can instill in us.” -Hal Borland
- “Celebrate each new day, and be grateful for every moment of this wonderful life. Happy New Day!” -yours truly
It’s that time of the year again – the happy new year wishes, fireworks, cheer, and most importantly, the optimism for the year ahead.
How about greeting each new day with the same cheer and optimism. Isn’t waking up each morning a reason to be grateful and happy? Isn’t every day a chance to celebrate life and everything it has to offer? If that seems a bit too extreme, then how about ‘happy new week’? Could we not be as excited about the challenges and surprises that each new week brings?
This year try new month resolutions at the start of every new month. I’ve tried and it works much better than new year resolutions.
Two related posts about the New Year: You DON’T need New Year resolutions! and Make it happen in 2013 – without any New Year resolutions!
[Photo of sunrise during an African Safari – December 2011]
Make it happen in 2013 – without any New Year resolutions!
I started struggling with my dreams at the age of 15, when I suddenly learnt that I was on my own. I had to stop schooling and start working. It seemed like the end of the world – no education, no family support, no money… all I had were dreams and love for a girl who was going to be my soulmate. I also had an extremely good luck to find the right people showing me the way and helping me along the way. [Some more of that story in my book introduction here.]
For over 30 years, I’ve been following what I call the “4-step method” to fulfill my dreams and achieve my goals, big and small, long-term and short-term. I got to the top of my dream job, traveled the world, achieved the health and fitness that I desired, started this blog… and more recently, got my first book published! I have also helped hundreds of people achieve their dreams through the same 4-step method. It’s not easy, but it’s simple:
- Dream. It’s the easiest part. We all have dreams. It’s a pity that sometimes we stop dreaming. We ‘learn’ that dreaming is no good; dreaming doesn’t help; dreams don’t come true. If you want a dream to come true, you got to have a dream. To follow step 1, you need to write your dreams down. It helps to think of your dreams as
- Things I want to do (learn… travel to… contribute to… experience… lose… quit…)
- Things I want to be (a manager/director… volunteer… a better…)
- Things I want to have (all the material stuff that money can buy…) [Inspiring quotes about dreams]
- Goal. Now that you have your dream list all sorted, pick one or two of them that inspire you the most. The things that can happen over the next 3-6 months. The things you are most passionate about. The things you’d do if you only had a year to live. And make that dream specific and time bound. E.g. ‘I want to travel’ is a dream; ‘I am going to see Guilin in April 2013’ is a goal. ‘I want to lose weight’ is a dream; ‘I am going to lose 10 kg in 10 weeks’ is a goal. You see the difference between a dream and a goal? This is often the hardest part because it requires you to make a commitment to your dream. [Related post] Continue reading
You DON’T need New Year resolutions!
That’s right. If you are happy with your life and don’t need any changes then you don’t need New Year resolutions. If you want to change or improve certain things in your life, you don’t have to wait for the New Year. And certainly New Year resolutions alone are not going to get you the results you want.
The most popular New Year resolutions seem to be:
- Health related: lose weight, get healthy, get fit, quit smoking, quit drinking…
- Money related: earn more, save more, get out of debt…
- Relationships related: find a soul mate, improve relationships…
- Other goals: job/business related, travel, learn something new, contribute…
And here’s why I believe most New Year resolutions fail:
- No commitment. Interested but not committed. Nice to have but not a must. If not this year, there’s plenty of life ahead.
- No belief. Goal setting doesn’t work for me. I am beyond any diet plan. I am not talented, skilled or lucky enough for…
- No knowledge/skill. You don’t know how to go about achieving that goal. For weight loss, you need to know/learn about food and exercise. To get out of debt or to invest wisely, you need to know/learn the basics of finance. If it’s a sales goal, you need to improve your selling skills and so on.
- No action. Procrastination. Excuses. I am going to start from Monday. It’s too cold/hot to go out running. Just one bite can’t make me any fatter. This is often due to reasons 1-3 above.
If the above sounds familiar, try something different this year. Don’t make any New Year resolutions. Instead, pick one thing that you really really want to change. And follow the tried-n-tested, never-fail, 4-step method for a few weeks/months. Once you have learnt and mastered that method, you can start on the next goal. Want to know about the 4-step method? Coming up in Sunday morning post!
[Photo of Tad Yeuang in South Laos. One of the things on my 2012 to-do list was to see the beautiful waterfalls of Laos and live in a village for at least two days. Check. See some more spectacular photos here, and a short video here.]
The amazing story of Cliff Young
The year was 1983. In Australia, the long-distance foot race from Sydney to Melbourne was about to begin, covering 875 kilometers—more than 500 miles! About 150 world-class athletes had entered, for what was planned as a six-day event. So race officials were startled when a 61-year-old man approached and handed them his entry form. His name was Cliff Young, and his “racing attire” included overalls and galoshes over his work boots.
At first, they refused to let him enter. So he explained that he’d grown up on a 2,000-acre farm, with thousands of sheep. His family could afford neither horses nor tractors so, when the storms came, his job was to round up the sheep. Sometimes, he said, it would take two or three days of running. Finally, they let Cliff enter, and the race began. The others quickly left him way behind, shuffling along in his galoshes. But he didn’t know the plan included stopping each night to rest, so he kept going.
By the fifth day, he had caught them all, won the race, and became a national hero. He continued to compete in long-distance races until well up in his seventies. He was an inspiration to millions and a great encourager of younger runners.
In his honor and memory, in 2004, the year after his death at age 81, the organizers of the race where he first gained fame permanently changed its name to the Cliff Young Australian Six Day Race. What was the key to Cliff Young’s success? It goes by various names: determination, perseverance, persistence, tenacity. It means keeping one’s eye fixed steadfastly on a goal, and not stopping, no matter the difficulties or the obstacles, until that goal is achieved.
[From the Best of Success by Simple Truths]
My notes: I continue to believe there are only four reasons why people don’t go after their goals, or give up too soon:
- Not committed enough to the goal
- Don’t believe it’s possible
- Don’t know how
- Too lazy (often because of #1)
Find more inspiration in my book, Dhinchak Life.
An extremely inspiring video: Janine Shepherd’s limited body, unstoppable spirit
Cross-country skier Janine Shepherd hoped for an Olympic medal — until she was hit by a truck during a training bike ride. She shares a powerful story about the human potential for recovery. Her message: you are not your body, and giving up old dreams can allow new ones to soar.
Monday morning inspiration: starting now!
These iCards (inspiration cards) are made with my own collection of photos that are un-copyrighted (free to use). Dhinchak Life is my first book. You may read about it here. More iCards and a feee ebook here.
What if?
What if…
- we start being a little more grateful for everything we do have?
- we complain a little less and compliment a little more?
- we accept everything and everyone exactly as they are?
- we wake up half an hour earlier every morning?
- we read something positive and/or useful every night?
- we focus on the most important tasks, instead of just the urgent ones?
- we exercise just 10 minutes every day?
- we replace just one unhealthy meal with a healthy one every day?
- we add just one healthy snack to our daily diet?
- we dedicate just one day of the week for our loved ones?
- we tell them just once a day we love them?
- we sometimes just listen without passing judgement or advice?
Each of these seemingly small actions have the potential to significantly improve our level of happiness, productivity, health and relationships… and improve the quality of our lives and the lives of people around us. Too difficult? Let’s start with just one of the above, just for this week!
“Just do it! First you make your habits, then your habits make you!” -Lucas Remmerswaal, The A-Z of 13 Habits
[A new day dawns over Shek’O in Hong Kong – courtesy Sara Mush]
Do dreams come true?
A post by Sara Mush on her blog: Do dreams really come true?
A question that every human being must have asked themselves at least once in their lives, and only very few people that I know have actually lived out their dreams while alive! It’s never easy… because it takes an insane amount of motivation, inspiration, determination and most of all passion and very few people can wake up every single day and wholeheartedly feel ready to take on a new day with that kind of optimistic mindset! Well, I know one person who does that for sure, the only person I know who preaches what he truly lives by!
My Dad has been dreaming about publishing his own book for years now, and he’s finally done it! He has been running his motivational Blog for around 2 years now, and once he had enough people telling him to compile his posts into a book, he decided to finally go ahead and do it! So the book Dhinchak Life; is a compilation of his best, most popular blog posts! Now you may be wondering, what is that word Dhin-Chak?! Well, it would be no fun if I was to give it all away here would it? [Read more…]
Mush Panjwani 