Happiness

Book Recommendation: Manuscript Found in Accra

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IMG_2337I just finished reading this wonderful book by Paulo Coelho, and recommend to anyone looking for inspiration. Some excerpts:

“Losing a battle or losing everything we thought we possessed will bring us moments of sadness. But when those moments pass, we will discover the hidden strength that exists in each of us, a strength that will surprise us and increase our self-respect. We will look around and say to ourselves: ‘I survived.’ And we will be cheered by our words. Only those who fail to recognise that inner strength will say: ‘I lost’, and be sad.”

“Defeat ends when we launch into another battle. Failure has no end; it is a lifetime choice.”

“Stay close to those who sing, tell stories, and enjoy life, and whose eyes sparkle with happiness. Because happiness is contagious and will always manage to find a solution, whereas logic can find only an explanation for the mistake made.”

“Anxiety was born in the very same moment as mankind. And since we will never be able to master it, we will have to learn to live with it – just as we have learned to live with storms. For those who cannot learn to do so, life will be a nightmare.”

What’s your favorite Paulo Coelho’s book? Or any inspiration book. Please share through comments.

Dinchack Facebook page crossed 2500 fans! Check it out for daily tips on happiness, motivation and success.

Dhinchak Life, free preview ebook!

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I turned 48 today, and this e-book is a small gift from me! This is part of the first section of my book, Dhinchak Life. If you already have the book, this may serve as a reminder of the principals that can make you happier, and in full color. And if you haven’t got the book yet, this may inspire you to buy a copy.

The photos used in the book are from my travels during the last year. I hope they inspire you to go out and visit these beautiful places.

Thanks to Sara Mush, my brilliant daughter, for creating this e-book version. Just click on the image to download, or download from here, and don’t forget to share with friends. Wishing you many Dhinchak moments!

11 benefits of napping during the day

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A wonderful illustration from Daily Infographic shows, humans consolidate sleeping time for a long period at night, but we’re designed to feel tired in the early morning hours and mid-afternoon, when a 2 p.m. nap would feel awesome. A 2- to 5-minute nap can perk you up and a 5- to 20-minute nap can improve your motor skills and performance.

Looks like life could become really ‘dinchack’ if we napped every day!

napping

The foundation for my dream company…

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What do you think of the company name and logo? What do you think will be the business of D!nchack? Thank you for your fantastic support and encouragement!

An exciting first week – after losing my job!

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The only reason I posted the news last Friday, within hours of getting fired from my job, was because it was the fastest and most efficient way of letting everyone in my world know what had happened and that I was actually excited about the situation. I never expected to receive 200+ beautiful messages through comments on the blog, Facebook, emails, SMS, whatsapp and phone calls! I can’t express in words how thrilled, excited, blessed and grateful I felt reading those messages. I smiled, laughed and cried. It would be a huge understatement to say that ‘you made my day/week’. You made my life! Thank you.

To those who keep saying ‘is that true?’ ‘how did it happen?’ ‘but why?’ ‘i still can’t believe’ etc., I can only say, ‘get over it, move on’!

To those who think they have lost a leader, mentor, guru, hero (and all those amazing words I didn’t think I was worthy of), I am very much alive and will continue doing what I do best. Feel free to connect with me through this blog, Facebook, or Twitter. I will also continue to post my photos and videos on Flickr and YouTube.

So what am I up to?

  • I have freelance work from the company till the end of April, to complete the ongoing projects and fulfill my travel commitments to the distributors. That means I get to see some of you soon!
  • I am working on my first CV ever, while also developing certain business plans. Absolutely over the moon about the possibilities!
  • I am doing more reading, more writing and more thinking! I’m still following the diet, and have more time for exercise too.
  • We have leased a much cheaper apartment at one of the edges of Hong Kong, and shifting in a few weeks. It’s much farther from the city but a bit bigger and right on top of a beautiful beach!
  • The family is totally supportive and positive, and we have never been closer!

Thanks again for your wonderful support and encouragement!

You are not just ‘OK’, you are ‘incredibly blessed’!

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DLOf all the things I have learnt about personal motivation, this is one of the most profound. I learnt this more than 20 years ago from the book Awaken the Giant Within by Anthony Robbins, and my life has never been the same:

  • English language has over 500,000 words, but our habitual vocabulary consists of 2,000 to 10,000 words. Less than 2%.
  • There are over 3,000 words to describe human emotions. About 1,000 for positive emotions and about 2,000 for negative emotions.
  • Most words, in addition to their literal meanings, convey distinct emotional intensity. This means our choice of words gives us the power to take the most negative feelings and lower their intensity to the point where they no longer bother us. And similarly, we can take a positive experience and move it to greater heights of pleasure.
  • What are some of the commonly used words to describe negative emotions? Now think of new words that help lower the intensity of the negative emotions e.g.
  • Replace ‘depressed’ with ‘not on top of it’
  • Disappointed with Under whelmed
  • Failing with Learning
  • Frustrated with Challenged
  • Pissed off with Peeved
  • I hate with I prefer
  • Insulted with Misunderstood
  • Painful with Uncomfortable
  • Illness/sickness with Cleansing
  • Stuck with Busy
  • Starved with Hungry
  • Similarly, what are some of the positive/mediocre words that you can replace with more powerful words to increase the intensity of the positive emotion e.g. Continue reading →

    • Good luck, bad luck, who knows?

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    RedLanterns

    Once upon a time, in a far away land, there lived a farmer with his family. This farmer had a horse that one day, ran away to the hills. So the farmer and his son had to plow their fields themselves. Their neighbors watched them working hard and said “Oh, we pity you, what bad luck that your horse ran away!” But the farmer replied “Good luck, bad luck, who knows?”

    The next week, the horse returned to the farm, bringing a herd of wild horses with him. “What wonderful luck!” cried the neighbors. But the farmer responded “Good luck, bad luck, who knows?”

    Then, the farmer’s son tried to ride one of the wild horses. He was thrown off and broke his leg. “Ah, such bad luck!” sympathized the neighbors. Once again, the farmer responded “Good luck, bad luck, who knows?”

    A short time after, the emperor recruited all young men to join his army for battle. The son, with his broken leg, was left at home. “What good luck that your son was not forced into the army!” celebrated the neighbors. And the farmer remarked “Good luck, bad luck, who knows?”

    A re-post from Eva Snijders’ blog.

    So what’s happening in your life that seems good luck or bad luck?

    [Photo of Chinese red lanterns – symbol of good luck – from Guilin]

     

    I lost my job today, but I am grateful and excited!

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    I lost my job today! Few immediate negative thoughts:

    • How could they do that to me? I’ve been working here for over 16 years!
    • What will I do now? There aren’t many opportunities in my specialized field and my set of skills!
    • How long can I survive without a job? The mortgage, bills, kids… and the bigger dreams!
    • Why did it happen at the worst possible time?

    Fortunately, there were a lot more positive thoughts that followed:

    • Most dynamic companies go through restructuring, reorganizing and cost-cutting. Nothing personal! 
    • Thousands of people lose their jobs every day around the world – there are over 197 million unemployed people. This is part of working life and can happen to anyone, any time.
    • There are endless opportunities if I look with an open mind, and beyond my current industry!
    • It’s an exciting challenge, and I am totally ready for it. I must stay focused, continue to believe and dream.
    • The timing couldn’t be better! I’ll be 48 in a few weeks. It’s time to do something even more exciting!

    And looking back, I felt even more grateful and excited that my job had allowed me to learn so many new things, develop different skills, almost master the art of training, travel the world, see amazing places, meet wonderful people… and above all, make a difference in the lives of so many people in so many places! My job is gone but all of that will stay with me forever! And all of that has prepared me for the next phase of my life.

    “When we least expect it, life sets us a challenge to test our courage and willingness to change. At such moment, there is no point in pretending that nothing has happened or in saying that we are not yet ready. The challenge will not wait. Life does not look back…” -Paolo Coelho

    Please feel free to share your words of support and encouragement through comments.

    Update (17th March): Thank you for such kind, nice, wonderful, amazing, surprising messages! I am deeply touched by your love. And also under a lot of pressure to do something big 🙂 I have no issues with the company, and do not wish to hear anything negative.

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    Happy Women’s Day! 10 quotes women would love…

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    IWD

    I am not a big fan of “days” – New Year day for resolutions, Valentine’s Day to show your love, Clean-up Day to un-clutter or Women’s Day to acknowledge that women rule… But here’s a collection of quotes for all the women in my life and the female readers of this blog. I know you’d love these:

    1. Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him. –Groucho Marx
    2. Women like silent men. They think they’re listening. -Marcel Achard
    3. Women have always been the strong ones of the world. The men are always seeking from women a little pillow to put their heads down on. They are always longing for the mother who held them as infants. –Coco Chanel
    4. The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think. -Author Unknown
    5. Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good.  Luckily, this is not difficult. -Charlotte Whitton
    6. Can you imagine a world without men?  No crime and lots of happy fat women. -Nicole Hollander
    7. A man’s face is his autobiography. A woman’s face is her work of fiction. -Oscar Wilde
    8. When men reach their sixties and retire, they go to pieces. Women go right on cooking. -Gail Sheehy
    9. Women always worry about the things that men forget; men always worry about the things women remember. -Author Unknown
    10. Look like a girl, act like a lady, think like a man and work like a dog. -Caroline K. Simon

    Please tell me which one did you like best. And share your own favorite quotes about women too.

    [Photo of two of the most wonderful, amazing, funny, friendly, beautiful and inspired women in my life.]

     

    One link at a time…

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    The full collection of my iCards (inspiration cards) are posted on this page, using my own photographs. Free to download and share.

     

    Bonus time

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    Jugja

    “Bonus time” is an interesting concept that keeps me happy when I am supposed to be angry, frustrated or disappointed.

    If my flight is delayed by an hour, I consider it the ‘bonus time’ I’ve been granted. Full 60 minutes of no plans, no commitments, no schedules! I can do whatever I like – read, work, think, relax, eat, take photos, call family, or just sit and do nothing for a change. Of course, I have the alternative to get angry at the airline; demand explanations; get upset about the delay; think of the rest of the things that would all be delayed by an hour… but none of that is going to help. Next time you have a delay or a wait, try to think of it as a gift of ‘bonus time’ e.g.

    • You have an appointment with a dentist, or with anyone else, but are asked to wait for half an hour when you arrive.
    • It takes you longer than planned on the road, due to traffic.
    • You queue up somewhere and it seems to take forever.

    In each of these situations, you have a choice to get upset or consider the waiting time as ‘bonus time’ in which you can do something positive, productive and unplanned – like making that call to someone special or catching up on the news or thinking some good thoughts or just conscious breathing. Will you try?

    [Photo taken during a road trip in Yogyakarta last week]

    A reason to smile

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    More iCards (inspiration cards) here.

    4 ways to feel unhappy and miserable!

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    Feeling unhappy and miserable must be one of the easiest things to do, considering that almost every other person does that most of the time. Here’s how I think people get unhappy, sad and depressed:

    1. Think of all the things you do not have: more money, the perfect job, better relationships, great health, slim body, free time… that’s sure to make you unhappy and sad.
    2. Focus on all the imperfections in the people around you: she is not tidy enough; he is not obedient enough; they are not caring enough; people are inconsiderate; he never listens; she never understands… that will make you angry and frustrated.
    3. Imagine all the things that could go wrong: you could lose your job; the economy could get worse; someone you love could leave you; there could be another tsunami; the world could come to an end; you could get a major illness… that will make you worried and depressed.
    4. Blame everyone and everything possible for all the problems in your life, except yourself: your parents/upbringing, your country/government, your company/boss/colleagues, your friends, the economy/’market’, customers/buyers, the weather, gods… and see if you feel the helplessness and lack of control.

    I know these always work; I have done that quite a few times in my life. Fortunately, I have also learnt the antidote to depression and unhappiness: Be grateful for what you do have; focus on all the good things; do not worry about things that haven’t happened; accept responsibility. I know it’s easier said than done, but it’s a fact that how we feel is totally in our control.

    “Just as your car runs more smoothly, and requires less energy to go faster and farther, when the wheels are in perfect alignment, you perform better when your thoughts, feelings and emotions are in balance.” -Brian Tracy

    [The two photos on top and bottom were taken within 15 minutes of each other – Aberdeen Harbor, Hong Kong]

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    The lies we tell…

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    The lies we tell ourselves and others…
    Lie: I am late because of traffic
    Truth: I am late because I got up late; I am late because I am not organized…

    Lie: I don’t have time to read/exercise/call…
    Truth: I am not really interested or committed

    Lie: I am not good enough for…
    Truth: I haven’t learnt how to…

    And some more…
    There’s plenty of time/life for…
    It’s just one bite…
    People are no good…
    I’ll be happy when…

    What other lies can you add?

    [Photo of sunrise in Hong Kong. Some more photos of the sun and moon between 31st Dec and 1st Jan here]

    “Un-inspiring” quotes about the New Year!

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    • “Write it on your heart that every day is the best day in the year.” -Ralph Waldo Emerson
    • “New Year’s Day: Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.” -Mark Twain
    • “Time has no divisions to mark its passage, there is never a thunder-storm or blare of trumpets to announce the beginning of a new month or year. Even when a new century begins it is only we mortals who ring bells and fire off pistols.” -Thomas Mann
    • “New Year’s is a harmless annual institution, of no particular use to anybody save as a scapegoat for promiscuous drunks, and friendly calls and humbug resolutions.” -Mark Twain
    • “Year’s end is neither an end nor a beginning but a going on, with all the wisdom that experience can instill in us.” -Hal Borland
    • “Celebrate each new day, and be grateful for every moment of this wonderful life. Happy New Day!” -yours truly

    It’s that time of the year again – the happy new year wishes, fireworks, cheer, and most importantly, the optimism for the year ahead.

    How about greeting each new day with the same cheer and optimism. Isn’t waking up each morning a reason to be grateful and happy? Isn’t every day a chance to celebrate life and everything it has to offer? If that seems a bit too extreme, then how about ‘happy new week’? Could we not be as excited about the challenges and surprises that each new week brings?

    This year try new month resolutions at the start of every new month. I’ve tried and it works much better than new year resolutions.

    Two related posts about the New Year: You DON’T need New Year resolutions! and Make it happen in 2013 – without any New Year resolutions!

    [Photo of sunrise during an African Safari – December 2011]

    It’s not them; it’s you!

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    Who is bothering you today?

    Kids who don’t think or behave exactly as you do? Or your spouse due to his annoying habit? Or the driver in front of you that’s too slow? Or someone else who is incompetent, rude, inconsiderate, uncaring…? If other people’s behavior is going to bother you, chances are you will always be angry, hurt, disappointed or frustrated… because ‘they’ are not going to change any time soon.

    So there are only two choices: accept everyone as they are, and focus on your own imperfections. Or continue to be annoyed at everyone who is not ‘perfect’ by your standards. Hint: One of the choices will give you lots of stress!

    “God, grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change; courage to change the one I can; and the wisdom to know that it’s me.”

    Inspiring moments in Laos
    Inspiring moments in Laos

    Buy Nothing Until 2013

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    From ZenHabits, one of my favorite blogs:

    Today is one of the worst days of the year: overconsumption day (or Black Friday as some call it). Or you could call it one of the best days of the year: Buy Nothing Day.

    I prefer the latter — it means we waste less, consumer fewer resources, stop looking to shopping to solve our problems and make us happy, and instead find simpler ways of finding contentment. And so today I extend a challenge to all of you, and the world: Buy Nothing Until 2013. Yes, I’m taking Buy Nothing Day and extending it through the end of the year.

    Why the hell would you want to do this challenge?

    Do it as a protest against consumerism and corporate influences on our lives. Do it as a tool for contentment, for simplicity. Do it to reclaim the holidays as a time of connection and love, not of buying and debt. Do it just to see if you can.

    And yes, you can still do it if you’ve already done some Black Friday shopping. We’ll forgive our past sins and start afresh. 🙂

    The Manifesto

    Buy Nothing Until 2013 is about freedom.

    Freedom from consumerism. Freedom from corporations (or a little bit of freedom, at least). Freedom from debt and overspending. Freedom from the need to shop to be happy. Freedom from the use of shopping as therapy or stress relief. Freedom from shopping as a way to connect with others. Freedom from buying to show our love for others. Freedom from sales and holiday madness and malls and huge chain stores and crazy shoppers. Freedom from overuse of resources, from wasted packaging, from wasted fuel to ship all that junk to the store.

    Freedom from crap we don’t need. We are more than consumers. We don’t need to buy gifts to celebrate the holidays with each other — we can get together, make delicious food, go outside and do something fun, play games, talk, tell jokes, tell stories, give hugs.

    We are alive, and don’t want to waste the hours we have in chain box stores and malls buying things we don’t really need. We know that just because stores have massive sales doesn’t mean we need to buy what they’re selling. Sales don’t mean we’re saving money — it means we’re spending it. We used precious life hours earning our money, and we want to use that to live, not buy.

    We are free from buying, and free to live. Join us, and Buy Nothing Until 2013.

    The Challenge Rules Continue reading →

    Monday morning inspiration: starting now!

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    These iCards (inspiration cards) are made with my own collection of photos that are un-copyrighted (free to use). Dhinchak Life is my first book. You may read about it here. More iCards and a feee ebook here.

    What if?

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    What if…

    • we start being a little more grateful for everything we do have?
    • we complain a little less and compliment a little more?
    • we accept everything and everyone exactly as they are?
    • we wake up half an hour earlier every morning?
    • we read something positive and/or useful every night?
    • we focus on the most important tasks, instead of just the urgent ones?
    • we exercise just 10 minutes every day?
    • we replace just one unhealthy meal with a healthy one every day?
    • we add just one healthy snack to our daily diet?
    • we dedicate just one day of the week for our loved ones?
    • we tell them just once a day we love them?
    • we sometimes just listen without passing judgement or advice?

    Each of these seemingly small actions have the potential to significantly improve our level of happiness, productivity, health and relationships… and improve the quality of our lives and the lives of people around us. Too difficult? Let’s start with just one of the above, just for this week!

    “Just do it! First you make your habits, then your habits make you!” -Lucas Remmerswaal, The A-Z of 13 Habits

    [A new day dawns over Shek’O in Hong Kong – courtesy Sara Mush]

    Happy New Week! Monday morning inspiration

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    More iCards (inspiration cards) here. And the full story on ‘happy new week‘.